Your Failures As A Son, Are They Your Failures As A Father?

If you are not sure that your child is ready to make important decisions about his life, read on and you will find out what you should do about it.

Recently, my 18 year old son found himself in the dilemma of not knowing what to do while starting college and what to do with his free time. So I made the mistake of telling him what I think he should do; But I reflected on whether I knew what he should decide, or whether it was better to trust that I had educated and set the example for my son on how to make correct and timely decisions.

Reflecting a bit on my past, I saw myself making decisions and what my rationale for them was. Many of the decisions I made had consequences that make me think they were not the right ones. Don’t get me wrong: I live happy and very content. But, because I have matured and I know how to face the consequences of my actions, I ask myself: did I teach my son about this decision-making and how to face the consequences?

How to help your child make decisions?

Richard Harris, film actor who played the Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius, in the film Gladiator , in the film he says to his son: “Your failures as a son are my failure as a father.” And like that phrase, there are countless examples of parents realizing their mistakes too late. I think that if I am aware of these mistakes today, I will not have to regret them later, and thus I will better help my children to get ahead in their decisions and in their lives in general.

I believe, without a doubt, that if someone had explained this to my husband and me, we would be better parents. For this reason, I share these tips so that tomorrow you do not feel guilt for what you could do, and did not do:

1. Show genuine interest in what your child likes

Real attention, on real problems, helps us as parents to better guide our children. Dedicate quality time to your children, no matter where you are in your life, the most important thing is the decision your children make with your support, example and guidance.

2. Let your child learn to make decisions

Your child will mature and learn better if you let him take his own ways, but with your support and solidarity. Your child will know that whenever he looks down that path, you will be behind his decision, to support him.

Some ideas to teach your child to think (part two)

3. Explain how a decision has consequences

If your child doesn’t experience the consequences of his decisions and you do it instead, you are not helping him. As time goes by you will realize and you will regret not having supported him better.

Difficult experiences grow children

4. If your child already makes decisions alone, support him as much as you can

If you allow your children to decide for themselves, I congratulate you. Now you just need to always support them, so they know that no matter the consequences, you will be there.

5. Motivate your child to fulfill his wishes

It is important to always create in your children a feeling of security and confidence that they can make the best decisions to achieve their goals, no matter how big you can see the mistakes they can make.

The role of decisions in the happiness of your life

A child is the most beautiful investment we can have, the returns it pays are a lot of love and a lot of happiness. Let’s not let our children ignore how to decide for themselves. No matter what modernity dictates: nothing can replace the quality time we share with them, especially when it comes to decisions that they must make.

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