We always hear about the duties of the older brother: take care of his sister, drive away boyfriends or be his bodyguard. Scarecrow? Chaperone sister? Duties of an older sister.
So is. Both men and women have different duties when it comes to being the firstborn in the family. In the case of men, this focuses on the area of protection and the role they play when the father is absent from home. Women, on the other hand, have an obligation to be “the glue” between siblings, the emotional and sentimental guide of our little brothers.
As time went by I learned that having a brother was not bad, that it did not only mean having to share toys, receive fewer gifts at Christmas or stop being the “center of attention” in each family activity; it also meant having an unconditional friend, a fantastic arch enemy, and the best “scarecrow” ever. Best of all has been the beautiful relationship that was formed between us and that we foster every day so that it continues to grow.
To cultivate a beautiful and fruitful sibling relationship, you must be clear about your duties as an older sister (or as an older brother, which also apply). Here are some of them to help you:
You are his sister, not his mother
Sometimes we assume a possessive attitude with younger siblings and try to fulfill the role of mother, but deep down we must recognize that we are not. We can take care of them, love them or advise them, but when we begin to impose rules, apply punishments or give them orders, we put aside our role: that of sister.
Respect so that they respect you
It is, hands down, the best advice I have ever learned. For everyone it is easy to see the straw in the eye of others, criticize and make undesirable comments, but the complicated thing is having the ability to assume that all people have the right to make mistakes and that, therefore, criticism should only be constructive and always generate contributions. Therefore, if you don’t have something nice to say, better keep quiet. When a student in class made an unfortunate or irrelevant comment, a teacher in high school would say, “You have lost the wonderful opportunity to be quiet.”
A little love doesn’t hurt
Use frequent displays of affection: a hug, a compliment, a kiss or a gift are gestures that will help you say and let him know “I love you.” Supporting him in his dreams, motivating him to be the best, or congratulating him on his achievements are also ways to show your love.
Relationships are based on caring, trust, and communication. Reinforce these three pillars day after day through sincere attitudes or small gestures, and little by little you will see how love / hate is left in the past to give way to a healthy relationship between brothers. The duties of the older sister or brother go through this sibling affiliation.