A study conducted in the United States concluded that the greatest stressors in wives are their husbands. Read the reasons and change your situation if it is fairly similar.
Perhaps at some point you have wondered where that man you fell in love with when you were a few years younger went. Quiet, that man is still there, hidden between that lack of interest in helping you at home, in that pouting face when you ask him to visit your family or to take time to go to the parents’ meeting at your children’s school.
Do not worry or be ashamed if because of that attitude you have reached the point of exasperation and at the same time they have had strong arguments about it; You are not the only one since there are few men who offer to share that type of family and home responsibilities, which should be assumed by both.
Given this situation, many women around the planet say they suffer stress at home for which they blame their husbands and not their children or at least that is what a survey carried out in the USA indicates, where more than 46% of the mothers of family affirmed it.
But what are the situations caused by husbands that generate stress in their partners?
It basically has to do with two great situations:
You might point out that this is partly the wife’s “fault” for expecting something from her partner; However, I would be very wrong to do so since it is only fair that you expect and have high expectations in the person with whom you share day to day.
The cause of placing so much hope in the husband is due to the current culture of gender equity and equality. Despite this, many men do not share that thought because for them it is the woman who must take care not only of raising children but also of everything that has to do with the home.
Given the evident lack of commitment to home responsibilities, many women prefer that their partner is away from home as long as possible, in this way they are less disappointed and household tasks become less complicated.
Thus the situation, it is natural for women to get frustrated with their spouses and disenchantment takes a toll on their days, causing stress from the number of occupations and the lack of help at home to overwhelm the wife.
The need for recognition of men
Many men feel that they are displaced by mothers when it comes to raising and educating children. For many it is a necessity that their efforts as parents be recognized, for them it is essential that they be thanked and encouraged with praise and kind words, which does not happen to women who do everything without expecting any kind of encouragement, although If it is given, do not reject it because a little gratitude is always good.
Undoubtedly, this situation arises due to the poor quality in the communication of the couple, the woman expects a lot from the man and he believes that he does enough at home. Everything would be very different if both spoke in a friendly way about what is desired and what is thought of the role of each one and reach an agreement.
And then whose responsibility is it?
It is not a matter of seeing who is to blame since in case having a relationship is not something that is built overnight and neither of them is perfect in relationships, if that were the case, there would be nothing to complain about.
The issue is to be sensible enough to recognize that a balance is not always achieved and that there is nothing wrong with it, this to avoid accusing the other of the problems both in the relationship and in the raising of children. The big problem is that many times women want to cover ALL the needs and missing issues, thus causing an alarming state of stress.
And how to remedy it?
The options are varied.
You can opt for couples therapy if the situation is quite pressing, but if it has not reached such a point, the couple can opt for simpler things that will strengthen the relationship with themselves as with the other.
Exercising together not only clears them up and changes their routine, it also allows them to spend time together and outdoors is a better option – and cheaper.
Practicing the art of speaking clearly and bluntly will also help them to know what the other person wants from their spouse, what they expect and remove the mania of assuming and expecting something from the other that the person as such has no idea. What is expected of him.
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Finally, if from the beginning both are clear in their purposes for the relationship, for themselves and for the children and they know the role to play or at least what the other expects from their partner, the problems will be less or less. at least one will have knowledge of the root of the difficulties.