Know and apply this neurolinguistic programming technique to reinforce positive behaviors in your children and support them emotionally. Their development can be optimal and you will feel better with this progress of your children.
I love my children with all my heart, but I can’t always communicate it to them. Sometimes I show them with hugs and caresses, others insisting until exhaustion (of them and me) in some tasks. It overwhelms me that in difficult moments, my love is just enough not to scream and hang them on the wall, and I resign myself to showing it only with looks and sighs or by taking a moment away.
Knowing hypnopaedia, however, has opened up a possibility for me to transmit messages to the subconscious of my little ones in a direct way, to empty their heads of unpleasant or harmful experiences as much as possible and fill them with words of encouragement and hope.
If you, like me, are looking for novel tools to communicate your love and appreciation to your child or are concerned about behaviors such as enuresis (wetting the bed at night) and lack of self-esteem in your children, then join me in this article.
What is hypnopedia?
This term means “learning through sleep” and was coined by the English writer and philosopher Aldous Huxley in his book Brave New World . In his work he narrates how short messages were made that were repeated at night to manipulate children. This new method has been applied over time by parents in a natural way with much nobler purposes: to share with their children what is difficult to communicate in the busyness of the day: that we love them, that we want to apologize for any violent reaction, that they are important and valuable.
And it is precisely this last approach to hypnopaedia that the coach and writers Patricia Valenzuela and Edmundo Velasco take up in their book Coaching for Happy Children .
The tale of the shark and the wall
Dr. Edmundo Velasco, Mexican and co-author of the book in which this technique is detailed, tells us about the need to reprogram the unconscious of our children based on a small video that I comment below:
A small shark fell into a fishing boat, and since they did not want to hurt it, the fishermen deposited it in a large fish tank. The shark needed to swim to breathe, so it advanced through the water in its new home, but without knowing how, because every time it approached a certain point it collided strongly with a thick invisible wall that hurt it. As the days went by, he learned that this barrier was impossible to overcome, and he tried to survive, so he did not go any closer, he resigned himself to taking other paths. Some time later, the acrylic wall was removed, and a spectacle was put on open to the public in which a beautiful woman exposed herself before the astonished eyes of the audience and surprisingly always came out unscathed, because the shark had learned its lesson well, and was restricted in your safe zone.
The doctor explains that what made the shark learn were the blows, and he relates this to a sad reality: sometimes we teach our children in this way: limiting their satisfactions, postponing their intense desires, sometimes raising our voices and probably with some hits. Then the child must postpone his desire to play with that wonderful toy because he must “wait until his birthday,” and he learns that sometimes some dreams “do not touch us.” Years later, the mother tries to encourage him to take a risk and set out to fulfill a dream, but the young man probably unconsciously thinks that “it is not his turn yet”, because it is not every day his birthday!
readHow to be the parents you always dreamed of being
The peace of mind of having tools to heal
For me, hypnopaedia represents an opportunity to heal some patterns that my son has perceived in our way of educating him, his interaction with me, with his father and with his brothers. As much as we have tried to give all our children love and support, I am aware that I make mistakes and I have not always succeeded, and it gives me peace of mind and hope to have this tool.
In the next point I will tell you in the mouth of one of its promoters how it is applied.
How to apply this technique?
On her blog, Patricia Valenzuela tells us that “speaking to your child’s unconscious brain is an opportunity that you should not miss. Two hours after he fell asleep is the exact moment for you to tell him how much you love him and how proud you are of him or her.
Talk to him about what you want to achieve for his benefit, for example: ‘Tomorrow you will wake up in high spirits. Tomorrow you will feel very encouraged when doing your homework. Tomorrow you will be very close to your little brothers and you will avoid the silly fights that make you sad. ‘
Clear his brain from television, violence or destructive comments, and create a relaxed sleep, accompanying his first hours of rest. Do it with a sweet and relaxed voice… you will feel comforted too «.
How about? Do you dare to apply this technique? Let us know how it goes!
I invite you to read: If you are a «helicopter father», you are spoiling the lives of your children!