Knowing that change comes into our lives at the exact moment we are ready to receive it makes us face it with greater security and joy. Letting go of paralyzing fear allows us to progress as we decide to change.
If they hear the call for change, it is because they are ready to receive it. Why is change essential in the life of every individual and family? If in most cases change is synonymous with improvement, what is the reason why people resist change? Why do we humans, unlike animals, understand that change is not only a privilege, but a matter of survival?
It seems that today talking about change is quite common. There are countless books that give us different views on how to deal with change in an objective way. In many of these texts we can find a simple phrase or word that makes us realize that change is calling our lives and that perhaps, out of fear or apathy, we have not heeded its call.
We know that in our lives it is necessary to make renovations, that our body and spirit demand them from time to time. Some of these transformations are seen in advance of their realization, so, to a certain extent, that allows us to receive them with greater acceptance. The same happens with those renovations that are generated in an imperceptible way.
When it comes to changes that are unexpected or that require us to undergo a true metamorphosis, our reactions are often overshadowed by doubt and fear. We become paralyzed in the face of those modifications that demand more than we think we can do or bear, without realizing that these are the great opportunities that life presents us to progress and improve.
Certainly, every good change requires effort. Sometimes it will be accompanied by exhaustion, despair, and even pain. That will surely be the hardest part to cope with if we are not aware that changes are only presented to those who are ready to make them.
Changing home, school, job, friends, partner, etc., are transformations for which we are prepared all the time, but we do not know. Perhaps in this lies the importance of becoming aware that opening ourselves to changes is embracing the possibility of becoming the best version of ourselves. Something similar to the above happens with families: like individuals, they are susceptible to change according to the circumstances of their members. As Spencer Johnson writes, “If you don’t change, you become extinct.”
Divorce, the death of one of the family members, the departure of children, the arrival of new members, etc., are modifications that by nature every family is exposed to suffer. It is probably not the same for parents to cope with the departure of their children, either because they get married or because they are going to study elsewhere, as it is for adolescent children to cope with the divorce of their parents. Regardless of the situation, in all cases true change finds its origin in the need for that group of people to evolve and progress, instead of dying out.
How to distinguish, however, the call for change? What are some of the ways in which it is presented to us?
One of the first warnings that change offers is having the feeling that a place, a job, a person, an attitude or a feeling stifles hopes and dreams. Sometimes we can find ourselves clinging to or used to some of these things, but we must understand that if we do not change we are losing the opportunity to breathe new air.
Unhappiness is perhaps the biggest warning that change sends us. Finding ourselves dissatisfied with who we are and with what is happening in our life, personally and in the family, is a sign that we must change root issues. If we notice that we do not smile often, that nothing we do produces true joy in our hearts and, above all, if we are indifferent to those things, places or people that at some point made us happy, we must accept that the Happiness has left there for us to activate and go out and look for it again.
Always look at ourselves in the same place and in the same way
Staying for a long time in a place and in a position that perhaps offers us comfort, but not evolution, is an announcement that we must change. If we constantly turn to see the memories of things, moments and people that are no longer in that place and that may never return, it is because the time has come to seek new paths that lead us to horizons in which to rebuild our own progress.
Not feeling ready to change
Along with unhappiness, the firm belief that we are not ready for change is the strongest call we can receive. Absolutely all human beings withdraw, automatically, when we are faced with the choice of changing or staying. But, if instead of allowing fear to paralyze us, we risk discovering that the more insecure we feel is because the more ready we are to change, the more easily we can confront the rest of the changes that await us to live.
Therefore, if change knocks on our door, do not be afraid to open it, because by doing so we are only learning to survive.