The love between siblings is a strong feeling that occurs since childhood. As time goes by, this affection must be taken with great care. I want to help my brother, but he is not allowed What I do?
From the first years of life, apart from parents, siblings take an important place in each person. Throughout your life, your siblings are your friends, rivals, confidants, advisors, etc., however, as time passes, each one takes different directions, lives and decisions. According to their place of residence or affinity, they may or may not have contact with a specific brother or always seek to be in contact with everyone.
There are brothers who despite the years continue to assume certain roles with their peers, causing, in some circumstances, major problems. It is not wrong that we seek to support our brothers, the point is to do it in such a way that one is not intrusive.
There are sensitive subjects that, as human beings, you are not allowed to tackle because, according to the other person, “he knows exactly what he is doing.” The couple is a very delicate point, even if they know that you are right in what you say, they deny everything, become infatuated and act according to what they feel, which can cause conflicts in the family in general. You worry that your brother is happy with her family, that they love her and respect her as she should be, but this does not always happen. For your part, you try to support him as much as possible, even if he doesn’t ask you to; Which is totally understandable, because this is someone who is of your own blood and it’s hard to miss.
However, you don’t always get the answer you want, which causes you anger and helplessness. If you are the type of sibling who likes to support, I suggest you keep reading the following lines:
1. Consider your circumstances
Don’t forget that your brother is old enough to do or act as he decides. He is no longer a child to whom you can approach to express your opinion, now he is no longer alone and his needs are different, very different.
2. Help without expecting anything
If you are going to help your brother, do not do it expecting him to act as you say, or to take what you suggest to the letter. Keep in mind that true help does not expect anything in return. Your brother is not the same as you, therefore, he does not have to do things the way you would, let him finally decide what he wants to do. As Shaysiu García teaches us in his great article, many times the greatest love is not always for a son, but for a brother.
3. Don’t collect the favors
If there is something that bothers people in general, it is that they are reminded of what they have done for them, and more if there was no request for help as such. So avoid doing so, because they may no longer accept anything for fear of being charged one day.
4. Never say, “I told you so”
This phrase is very trite and at the same time annoying: on the one hand, it carries a certain load of presumption, as if you were perfect and on the other, you tell him what he already knows, that he was wrong.
One of the most sincere and noble affections is precisely that of a brother, so you will always look for the best for him; But if you really want to help him try to be very cautious, otherwise you might lose him. Do not forget to always remind him how important he is to you.