Hidden in our mind are the enemies of happiness; discover them, face them and find your way to a fuller life.
The search for happiness is the ultimate goal of each person; it is your purpose and goal. And what applies to the person, also applies to the family. Much has been written about how to achieve it, and through this article I want to show you the way, although not the one that tells you “do this to be happy.” What I want is for you to reflect on various aspects that are probably the inexhaustible source of human unhappiness and that, from there, you can build your own path towards personal and family fulfillment. I do not claim, however, to give you an absolute truth, just to show that many of your beliefs may limit your potential to live a more fulfilling life.
In principle, I want you to ask yourself, “What is happiness for me? What is happiness for mine?” I suppose you know that happiness is relative and subjective, and individual; the same moment, the same sunset, the same sunrise, the same landscape do not mean the same to everyone and they do not generate the same thing in everyone. In this article you will find other ways to achieve happiness: Three principles to achieve happiness.
Each one must discover what fills him and makes him happy, what puts him in tune with family happiness, but first he will have to shed many ideas that limit him. Join me in this reading and discover them:
Need for approval
There is no greater source of pain, anguish and anxiety than the need to be approved and liked by all, but that will never be possible. That need is latent and is founded from childhood. What can you do about it? María Cecilia Betancur, in her book The day you love yourself , indicates several alternatives to this almost “dead end”:
Stop behaving as irreplaceable and essential.
Give up the urge to make an impact.
Value the work of others.
Accept that you are not capable of doing everything.
Avoid intentionally arousing admiration.
Stop the race to show yourself your own qualities.
And Dr. Betancur jokingly says, “I do not recommend a gourmet attitude. I recommend that you be prudent in ensuring financial well-being, and balanced in the effort to achieve a good level of quality of life. Spend time for better pleasures than having more work, making more money, or reaching a higher social ladder. Self-actualized people don’t feel the need to forcibly sell themselves the idea of their own worth.
It is, as can be seen, simple exercises that help us to give up little by little that dependence and need to be accepted and loved. Yes, it is important to be recognized and loved, but you don’t have to depend on it to be happy; It is not necessary to make the praise of the other the source of happiness, because when it does not come, or instead of praise comes contempt, the pain is infinite, so it is necessary to be prepared to receive both.
The absence of a sense of life
, of a real project, of feeling useful for himself.
Give with conditions
When you give and expect something in return and you don’t always receive, unhappiness knocks on your door. A good exercise to prevent this is to learn to be truly unconditional, but, like all learning, it will take practice. Just for today, give without expecting a retribution: a kiss, a hug, a compliment, a word of encouragement; offer your help and don’t expect anything.
Live in the past or in the future
, forgetting about the here and now.
Seeking happiness outside of yourself
and believe that it is the responsibility of others to make us happy, when the sole responsibility is ours.
Let yourself be dominated by fears
. In the book Happiness is in you , Octavio Aceves says: “As unwanted travel companions, we all carry more or less recognized fears, fears that hold back the development of our present and future life. The only way to take away the power they have over us is to look them face to face and try to discover their origin ”. Aceves maintains that on many occasions fears are imposed, and in this regard he proposes: “React and reject the fears of others as if you were taking off an old and out-of-fashion suit, which you also don’t even have affection for, and throw it away. You are you, with a mind and a life of your own. And only you have the power to live it in the best possible way ”.
The absence of God and his creative power in your life
The list could be even longer, but if you start little by little by working honestly on these tasks, personally and in the family, you will find a small light that guides you towards a more pleasant and happy life. Also, do not stop reading this interesting article Do you want to know the secret of a happy life?