Stop living burdened by what you are not and do not have. Life is a gift that happens while you wait for something more, that it does not get out of hand!
Elena was a burdened woman. She had three children who kept her active and busy all day. She was overwhelmed by covering everything that seemed important to her family, but in the daily grind, she ended up being absent. She was unable to play with her children in the afternoon because she was busy preparing the impeccably healthy meals that her family would eat the next day. She cared so much about beingthe perfect mom ,that she just forgot to be a mom.
This situation happens to us often, and not only to mothers. Also to young people, to parents. Sometimes we also carry the weight of theperfectionism in children , causing them nostalgia and sadness.
What happens is that the current world sells us the lie of perfection. And what is worse: we bought the idea.
Be perfect, they tell us
On one occasion, I went to a clothing store. And I saw with sadness that no size fit my Latin body, sizes were impossible. Has it happened to you? It’s the worst! You end up thinking that your body is deformed or that it is from another planet.
Can you see the irony in this? We allow a store that produces serial products to affect us so much that we doubt our wonderful body, that with hunger, sleepiness, bad days and fatigue, it takes us forward day by day, and allows us to love and share life with our beings dear.
The saddest thing is that we allow pre-established patterns to be imposed on us from the outside that enclose and limit us in other aspects of our life.
And we start with the “must”, which becomes a prison: «You must be a perfect mother or father»« Excellent and effective at home and at work »,« comply with everything and willingly », “Always productive and capable”, “Solve any problem without neglecting the house or work pending.” So much demand ends up becoming a heavy snowball that at some point will crush us.
Yearn for the mirage
There are many stories and anecdotes that help us see that looking for the perfect will end up destroying us, or at least affecting our experience of acceptance and fulfillment. Greek mythology tells of one that I would like to tell you about:
The architect Daedalus had built a labyrinth for King Minos in Crete. As it was the prison of a terrible monster, the king had decided to trap the builder along with his son, so that no information about its structure or exit would be leaked. Then, Daedalus showed his skill by building wax wings for himself and his son Icarus. With them they would finally manage to escape. As the wings could melt in contact with the heat, the father warned his inexperienced son that he should fly and enjoy the trip, but keep a safe distance from the sun.
Icarus, despite the warning, was so amazed by the beauty of our star that he got too close. As you can imagine, his wings melted and he rushed hopelessly into the sea, where he died.
Sometimes you and I are so amazed by social mirages, and by what commercials, social media and appearances show us, that we melt our self-confidence, our faith in ourselves, for something unreal. When embracing our imperfection is what will free us and let us fly with freedom.
Embrace your imperfection
It is true that Jesus has invited us to seek perfection: “Be perfect as my heavenly father is perfect “. But that perfection is far from the perfection we humanly seek.
Jesus knows us well. He knows that our nature is damaged by sin, and that we often fall. Because He knows and loves us, He embraced our imperfection first, forgiving all the falls into idolatry and lack of faith that we can see in the Old Testament, and daily forgiving you and me when, with our heads bowed, we acknowledge before Him that We have fallen and we want to have a new life and start over.
But seeking perfection in Christ is not the same as trying to fill a prefabricated and commercial human mold, to belong, to be accepted, to be within some social group.
Embracing our imperfection can be liberating. Recognizing our incapacity, our fatigue, our natural limits, our mistakes, is the main way to free ourselves. Embracing our imperfection is accepting and loving ourselves as we are.
Accepting me is the way to accept others
The way of life is that, a journey. How much would we gain if instead of trying to fill other people’s molds, we took with affection the person we are today!
Achieving this would also help us to look at others in a loving way, considering that we each carry unique and personal burdens, along with emotional wounds that sometimes prevent us from moving forward.
By accepting that neither you nor I are perfect, we can recognize and value imperfection in others.
Live in the present
An expectation is an expected behavior or experience. The negative aspect of them is that they get us stuck in the “should”, taking us out of the present, where life actually happens.
Yes, it would be amazing if you had that extra income that would allow you to go on vacation, but you don’t. What will you do? Get frustrated because you couldn’t get it? That is an option, you can choose it, but it will generate a lot of regret. What else can you do? See what you do have: life, beings you love, a job, hope, health, air, love.
He would not exist
There is a sad popular saying that “nobody knows what they have until they see it lost.” Today, you and I can recognize that the “would” does not exist. This means that castles in the air are mist. What is next to you and within you is what will allow you to build a better life.
Today you are full of blessings. I sincerely hope that you dare to look at them, have faith! Have hope! The best is yet to come.