Helena’s story will help you overcome the difficulties of divorce and start a new life.
Many of the people who divorce or separate do not see that event coming, because their partner does not show that they are dissatisfied with the relationship. On the other hand, separation or divorce entails a grief not inferior to that experienced with the death of a loved one and, like all grief, requires a process of overcoming and recovery; it is a starting over mid-life and in the middle of nowhere.
Helena was married for 15 years, she did not divorce her ex-partner because she did not love him or because they had “irreconcilable differences” like those excuses that famous people often claim to end their marriages, no. It only happened that one morning in the middle of breakfast he told her that he was already tired of the routine and seeing the same face every day, that he had imagined his marriage differently and that simply if he stayed married for another month it would end. doing some crazy thing.
Those words certainly devastated Helena. Still, she was filled with courage and told him that if that was her wish, she might as well go; to file for the divorce and that she would sign whatever she had to sign and there would be no problem. Before he knew it, she stopped being married and became a divorced woman.
“15 years thrown away!” She told herself with tears in her eyes and full of frustration. Immersed in a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions, she believed that she would never again be the vital and happy woman she had been in the past.
A few months passed and to Helena’s surprise, the anger, frustration, sadness and loneliness that had tormented her at first and did not allow her to sleep or eat well, gave way to tranquility and the desire to move forward for the well-being both of her and her. that of their children. What did Helena do to get ahead?
One fine day, Helena decided to renew her life and made a list of goals where she placed, according to her interests, short, medium and long term plans.
He sought to be productive
He decided that he would look for a job or he trusted that he could start a business of his own, but he was not going to give idleness a chance to take charge of his life.
His physical appearance changed
It was necessary to raise her self-esteem, so she went to a beauty salon to have her hair changed, since she had had it the same way for several years.
Sought professional help
She received psychological therapy to restore her relationship with herself, trust her more, and regain her lost spirit due to divorce and marital conflicts.
The result of Helena’s decisions
Little by little, her new business, a different personal appearance, and therapy with the psychologist showed her that she was not a failure. She understood that although her relationship with her ex-husband had ended, it was not just her fault; Gradually, she regained her lost confidence and was a better support for her children. When she was grateful to life for the experiences she had had throughout their 15 years of marriage, she understood that it had not been a wasted time: it was a well-deserved apprenticeship where she had emerged as a better person than she was before. And all because she had a family to fight for and a life to be happy with.
Helena, as well as many women and men, is just one example of struggle and overcoming difficulties. Yes, it is true that a divorce or separation leaves wounds that are very deep, but they also give the possibility of starting a new life, which can be happy and successful thanks to the learning left by past failures.