When the children arrive, love towards the couple can be fragile. These tips will help you reconnect.
The connection with the couple in the first years of marriage is magical, where each tries to satisfy the other, where they please each other and gradually learn about their strengths and weaknesses. Love abounds most of the time, since the only priority is to live meaningful experiences with the one you love.
Over the years, the connection keeps changing, as it is thought about formalizing the commitment, and love, with the desire to have children and become parents. It is a wonderful stage; however, when the young offspring are born, the attention is monopolized by both parents.
That feeling of being with the partner, of passion and conquest, is diminishing, since the relationship takes a back seat. Sometimes, marital relationships fail as they forget to meet the needs of the couple, to rekindle love and strengthen it when the children arrive.
Parenthood and the couple
It is normal for the children to have priority in every relationship; they are the fruit of love, wish fulfilled and dreams. Are themotor, the motivation and the strength to fight against adversity. In a word, children are a blessing.
Fatherhood should not take away the desire to be with the partner, on the contrary, love should be stronger and more solid every day, without losing that magical connection. Since now the two must learn to balance responsibilities, obligations and establish agreements to obtain a family welfare.
Therefore, I share some ways to reconnect with your partner after having children:
1 Learn the language of love
Gary Champan in his book “5 Languages of love”, Explains that in order to connect with the couple, one must think for the well-being of the person they love. Expressing meaningful, encouraging phrases that help lift your spirits. In this way, the couple can feel safe and confident, since they will develop their potential to the maximum.
Use kind, loving and sincere phrases, for example: “you are the love of my life, I love you more every day, being with you is the best thing that has happened to me in life, you are a wonderful husband and father, you are very intelligent” , among other.
2 The best time
It is a pity to see entire families that go out to a restaurant and each member is spending it using their cell phone; children with games, mom and dad connected on their social networks. The time they live together is zero, it is not of quality, since they do not talk and do not spend time getting to know each other.
It is important to know that the time you spend with your partner is limited, since both of you have to fulfill their roles and responsibilities; For this reason, this time must be of quality and the best you can offer.
Take advantage of every moment to do things you both enjoy; watch a movie together, go for a walk, organize a romantic dinner, talk, solve your problems, have intimacy, and so on.
3 Long live love
Details are essential to rekindle love in the couple. You do not need to complicate your existence planning what will be the best gift, since the only thing that matters are the things you do to show your love, such as unexpected messages, the favorite food you can prepare, tickets to go to a concert, flowers, chocolates, etcetera.
4 Shaping the future
One way to reconnect with your partner are goals and dreams; This is when the two of you agree and work together to achieve your wishes. For example: they want to go on a trip, buy a house, have more children, adopt a pet, save, among other things.
The goals that you set should be short-term, since the two of you will celebrate and share the happiness to see them fulfilled. Ideally, they should be renewed from time to time, because the secret to rekindling love will be in the support they give each other.
5 Be less ” grinch”
He never helps me wash the dishes! He always leaves his clothes lying everywhere! He never wakes up when he sets his alarm! He is no longer romantic! You can spend your whole life complaining about the things your husband does or does not do, seeing the flaws and not the virtues. Therefore, that type of thinking will lead you to conflict with your partner.
When you want to connect with your husband, you have to learn to change the way you think; Focus on the positive things, the good times, their strengths and virtues. Maybe she doesn’t help you with the housework, but she makes you breakfast every morning.
6 Say “thank you”
It is easy to fall into the error of assuming that the couple knows that you are grateful for the time they have been together; even the little things are not fully appreciated. However, appreciation is the key to reconnecting with your partner, as it demonstrates care and appreciation.
Thanks To your partner, value their effort and say thank you a thousand times. Thank you for what you do, thank you for being a good husband and father, thank you for your support, thank you for listening to me, and so on.
Even a study confirmed that making the partner feel appreciated influences how you feel in your marriage, being this the key word to improve the relationship.
Remember that love must be lived every day, that marital happiness is found in meaningful experiences, in small details, in displays of affection and quality time. Love, communicate and respect your partner!